Get Less Bad Days With This One Shift

Living with PMDD can feel like riding an emotional rollercoaster you didn’t sign up for. One week you’re yourself, the next you’re thrown into a storm of symptoms that can feel unbearable. The instinct for many of us is to push harder, power through, and fight our way back to “normal.”

But here’s the thing: that fight often makes the suffering last longer.

In one of my sessions this week, a client shared a breakthrough that captured this perfectly. She said:

“The more I respect the state that I’m in, the quicker and easier the transition is out of it… when it feels tough, you can actually just soften into that.”

The Power of Respecting Your Cycle

Instead of resisting her luteal phase, she leaned into it with self-compassion. She gave herself permission to rest, said no to the conversations she didn’t want to have, and stopped arguing with her own needs. And the result? She felt calmer, more in control, and less consumed by the symptoms.

This is what I often call “softening into the hard moments.” It doesn’t erase PMDD but it changes the way you experience it.

Why Fighting Makes It Worse

When we fight PMDD, we add another layer of pain: guilt, shame, or frustration that we’re not doing enough. That inner battle stretches out the suffering and leaves us exhausted.

Respect, on the other hand, shortens the spiral. By recognising “this is where I am right now,” we make space for the transition to come sooner and smoother.

Practical Ways to Soften Into PMDD Symptoms

• Rest when you need to. Think of it as giving your body exactly what it’s asking for.

• Hold boundaries with yourself. Not every thought needs to be acted on right away—sometimes it can wait until “the band’s back together.”

• Choose softness over armour. Instead of pushing through, allow yourself to lean into comfort, quiet, or stillness.

• Respect your cycle. Align your tasks with the energy of each phase, rather than expecting yourself to perform the same way every day.

You’re Not Alone

If you live with PMDD, know this: there is hope. These shifts—moving from resistance to respect, from force to softness can change the way you move through your cycle.

And if you’d like support, I run PMDD support groups where women come together to share, learn, and feel less alone. If this resonates with you, I’d love to have you with us.